"You ever been so high you called 9-1-1, maaaaan? You ever been so high you woke up in a bed of Doritos, maaaaan?"
In the case of a 22-year old Youngstown, Ohio resident, the answer would be a resounding "YES."
A rookie smoker made the mistake of smoking too much weed (probably like 2 hits) and got freaked out and called 9-1-1 to inform them that he was too high.
Police were sent to the guy's address where an officer reported hearing groaning coming from the bedroom. That's when he witnessed this embarrassing display:
"The officer then found the man lying "on the floor in the fetal position" and "was surrounded by a plethora of Doritos, Pepperidge Farm Goldfish and Chips Ahoy cookies," the report said. The man also told police he couldn't feel his hands."
C'mon dude, could you not be anymore of a stereotype?! Twenty bucks says he was blasting Sublime and his search history would pull up "things high people do."
Police didn't charge the man with anything -- presumably because being a n00b was enough -- and he refused medical treatment.