There are plenty of douchebags at your local coffee shop: no fat, no lid, soy guy, the guy who just wants to suck the free wi-fi tit, the homeless dude. Oh, and also Michael Cane. 

NachoPunch has rounded up these people who are all some sort of writer working on a novel/screenplay, OR they just need to use the bathroom. 

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get a free refill of free-trade Colombian blend that was ground between the bodies of two grinding high schoolers.