Welcome to Idiotech, the column where we shame your parents, teachers, and other old people for being dumb about technology. If you think your parents are even stupider than this, submit your story at the bottom of this page.

Jesse Eisenberg Invented Facebook

According to my mom, Facebook was only invented 3 years ago. Also, Jesse Eisenberg, not Mark Zuckerberg, was its creator. She's positive about both of these things because she watched The Social Network.- Anonymous

Somebody hacked my email and sent out spam to a bunch of people including my grandma. My grandma called my mom and asked her why I would send her a request for a penis enlarger. She then sent an email to everyone who it was sent to saying it wasn't my fault, and I would never send something like that!- Anonymous

My dad is a bit of a unique case in that he LOVES technology but he really only wants to get stuff as soon as its available just to be able to say he has it. He got the optional Bluetooth in his new car 5 years ago but had no devices to connect it to, a DSLR camera that he complains isn't as simple to use as his old regular digital camera, an iPod that he bragged about endlessly until he lost it 3 weeks later, and a plasma TV that he bought when they were still $4k apiece with which he still needs help switching back to the cable after my brother uses his PS3. He understands just enough for my benefit but not enough so it isn't still hilarious.- Anonymous

My dad was trying to tell me a story about the daughter of his colleague who was looking at pictures on a silver and black metal thing. I asked if was an iphone or maybe an ipod touch. He said he had no idea because he has never heard of either of those things.- Anonymous

Whenever my grandma sends me a text, an IM, or shes commenting on a picture on facebook, she ALWAYS writes "Love Grandma"- Anonymous

My grandma called me on my cellphone and asked for my mom, I told her to call her on the house phone. She said she thought she already had. We hang up and 2 seconds later she called me again, I said "grandma you called me again!" she said "No I didn't!!"- Anonymous

My boyfriend was doing some routine maintenance on his aunt's desktop. After running some anti-virus software he installed Firefox, and then went to explain to her how to use it. He said "I named the Internet Explorer shortcut, the one with the blue E, 'don't use me' and moved it over to the side. I moved Firefox, the one with the orange fox, into its place and called it 'Internet.'" She asked "Can I still Google with that one?!"- Anonymous

Every time my mother get's a text she tells me that she has to check her "text mail" before it disappears.- Anonymous

I was recently married and at the wedding one of my drunken girlfriends gave my husband's friend a lap-dance. We visited with my husband's parents the next day and spent the majority of the conversation listening to new my mother-in-law lecture us about how lap-dances are how AIDS is spread and how disappointed she was to have a street walker at the wedding.- Anonymous

My mom still doesn't understand the fact that the internet and the computer are two separate things. "No, people will not be able to see what's on your desktop if you send an email."- Anonymous